Second day... thoughts.. misses... reponsibilties with abit of added humor...second day passed... its torturing... although i don cry already.. coz my friends and collegue and friend all surround me whole day...and also i told myself no crying anymore.. it onli makes it harder for him... but my eyes kept going to my phone.. my mind is all him... and i keep my phone with me 24-7, so i wun miss any sms or calls.. coz i noe its very hard for him to call or sms... so i cant miss any of it... and also i miss him... every chance is important... its very hard to concentrate... and i don wish to concentrate.. i juz wanna hide somewhere and wait for him to contact me... i don wanna do anything... =( but i cant.. i got responsibilty... to my fyp.. to my fyp team mates... to starbucks... my partners and my customers.... arghh... i wan him back to me real bad NOW... and its lik... wat? 13 days to go... omg...
i think i drove all my friends crazy today with the " i wan to swim to tekong now" .. and also im telling everyone i miss him... thinking that if i tell more ppl.. im spreading my misses to everyone so i wld feel better... but of course.. its foolish... coz it didnt get any better... i still miss him strongly lik fire ah~
I bought his Mac coke glass today.. promised would buy for him.. so i bought it at cwp ... then go sch then straight away go for work... and got chase by the rain while go to work.. reali practically chasing me hiax..... i was so distracted by my own feelings and i felt so forlorn and when im going home after work.. i lost my way... something so simple as taking an mrt.. but i took the wrong side... got down at cityhall... then i was lost.. totally forgot it would bounce back, turn about and go back yishun... so i walk out of the train.. and by time i realise my mistake... the mrt was gone.. i felt so helpess and lost waiting for the next train... all through the jorney home im juz lost and confused... i wan him i wan him i wan him... tats all my mind was about becoz i know at this hour i cant contact him...his phone has to be off.. but my mind is all him him him him him... oh gosh..
i guess beside the torture... its gd that he went for army... at least we noe how much we need each other by our side. Nt even the my cambodia trip and his thailand trip made us missed each other so so much, so much that everytime i think of him my heart ache... only now telling each other smthing simple lik " i miss u " and " i love u " became something as neccessary as water and food... before going to NS... i believe we could count how many times of that we said to each other in 6 mths.... in the past maybe only after very big fights btw us... now it juz kept pouring from us to each other.... frm the heart...
ppl think is juz army mah... some even congragulate me that i am free and can go have night life and fun.. but truely.. knowing that he is not watching me or even contactable to me if im in danger, makes me totally not wanting any night life fun... its totally no fun without him... without him somewhere reachable..
allan even came to the work place today.. and joke abt laogong going army and saying that now wan tok to bf.. don wan tok to him.. and I AM ON PHONE WITH LAOGONG!!!... so angry that he disturb wat little time that i have with laogong.. so i scolded him, swatted away his hand and was abit harsh with my words... now i feel abit bad.. but he is really intruding at the wrong time! laogong is my piority now.. i waited the whole day juz to tok to laogong for 5 mins before he slp... so i got angry that allan wanna disturb me at that time... but i guess it was inevitable... if this way is the only way to stop his "friendliness".. then i have to do it i guess... tired of ppl saying we are a pair.. becoz we will nv be!
i want laogong back!!!! if only i can swim over to tekong... if only swimming over there can let me see him, kiss him, hug him an bring him home
legally without getting eaten up by some weird sea creatures... i would have swim over le!
laogong.. really miss u so so much.. im gonna hug till u feel that ur bones will break when i see u after 2 weeks... hehe...